Saturday, February 1, 2020

Working Moms vs Stay At Home Moms Pros and Cons

You could never have a healthy, normal, and happy relationship with them, and all you craved was love and some parental affection. Whether one is a stay-at-home parent or a working mom, motherhood is challenging and stressful. Facing social isolation when spending time mostly with children.

Regardless, it’s a blessing to have that time with your kids, and stay-at-home moms understand that. There’s been a long-standing debate on if a stay-home mom or working mom has a harder job. However, one study now shows that the moms who stay home win the discussion. The study indicated that stay-at-home parents are more stressed-out than parents who work.

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stay at home moms work harder

Of course the ones who spend hours every day with friends and shopping doesn’t deserve the title “stay at home Mom”. My mother was a stay at home Mom and even if she was sick she never went out “shopping” for herself unless Dad made her, never sat down, skipped breakfast all the time just because she didn’t have time. Most meals are prepared fresh–not reheated. Weekends are spent with family and church activities, and Sundays we try to do our best as a day of rest.

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This feeling of guilt may or may not go away over time, and is unfortunate to have to feel but inevitably it does still happen to work mothers. It’s quite possible that mothers would have more energy overall when they feel happier by continuing their career pathway after giving birth. Often we hear about how exhausting motherhood can be, yet, less often we hear about women feeling unfulfilled leading to that exhaustion when they are no longer pursuing their work endeavors.

As a stay-at-home mom, I was always putting out energy. And I was not spending enough time receiving peace and quiet or using my contemplative brain. This was physically and mentally exhausting.

What makes staying home with your kids hard?

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stay at home moms work harder

I raised an infant, and want to know something? I read somewhere about “The world toughest job is being a mom” and I just had to wonder what those guys in the army or working over at oil rigs or miners were thinking about that…. Hell what that guy who worked at Mc Donalds was thinking at the time was bullshit. These are very real stories that I’ve heard rehashed numerous times by some of my own family members and the wives of my co-workers.

Take all of the details of your lifestyle into consideration when you’re deciding to stay home or go back to work. If you aren’t already good at managing your time, you’ll catch on. At some point, it will all slow down…remind yourself of that when you become a working mother. But, when you become a working mother the mode of your life is naturally set to go mode – which ultimately means you’ll need to learn to be the most efficient version of yourself. If you previously worked and decided not to after having a subsequent child, it might affect your household financial status more so than if you decide to stay home full-time after your first child.

stay at home moms work harder

The number of stay-at-home dads is rising. Millennials hold more egalitarian views when it comes to gender roles. Millennials are also taking on established work-life balance norms and practices, demanding greater flexibility and sufficient time for their personal lives. Many find Anne-Marie Slaughter’s message that ‘care is as important as career’ compelling.

Moms who stay home to take care of their kids don’t get a break from the emotional, mental, and physical energy that it requires. A separate bank account or investment in only her name might help alleviate anxiety about feeling financially dependent on her husband and give her peace of mind that she won’t be destitute in the event of a divorce. Stay-at-home moms know that their time is limited.

Maybe this time is happening right now, as you read this, and that’s why you’re here in the first place – to sort through the slew of questions. Or if you’ll need to work outside of the house prominently throughout your time raising a young child or multiple children. I then go about tidying the house, and getting trash out, as my spouse doesn’t have the “time” to clean up after herself. She goes to bed and I’d I am lucky I get there by 2am. I’m still not understanding why someone wouldn’t find at least a part time job after the kids have gone to school?

Keeping a house clean without children tossing toys around, breastfeeding pillows laying about, and let’s not forget how much you’ll need to sit down with your baby to nurse or burp them can seem like hard work. Weekend comes and I do laundry and re tidy the house…meanwhile wife complains that we do everything late. Keep in mind that she doesn’t drive so I get to cart her around. If there is appointment for her or baby I get to leave work and do it which costs Me time and money. Oh, and she says she’s “starting a business” and needs the time off.

What is the point of the book I just wrote lol? Well, I’ve done both and there has to be an appreciation of both. My hubby doesn’t take me for granted and I sure do not take him for granted. But, from my personal experience, stay home mommy is definitely more work.

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